


Reaching within a Dream

by thebasement_archivist



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Angst, Drama, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Resolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-02-12
Updated: 2004-02-12
Packaged: 2018-11-20 15:00:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,180
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11337846
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thebasement_archivist/pseuds/thebasement_archivist
Summary: Two shadows in the night.





	Reaching within a Dream

**Author's Note:**

> Note from alice ttlg, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [The Basement](http://fanlore.org/wiki/The_Basement), which moved to the AO3 to ensure the stories are always available and so that authors may have complete control of their own works. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in June 2017. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [The Basement's collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/thebasement/profile).

Reaching within a Dream

### Reaching within a Dream

#### by SpookyStarbuck

  


Title: Reaching within a Dream 

Author: SpookyStarbuck 

Summary: Two shadows in the night. 

Category: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Drama 

Pairing: Mulder/Krycek RST 

Rating: R for mild language, sexuality 

Disclaimers: Not mine. Chris Carter owns them. 

Spoilers: Assume all Krycek episodes. 

Fox Mulder swam up out of a deep sleep. He rubbed his face blearily. He looked around the apartment, found it empty and swore. 

"Damn" 

Another dream. This one had been so real, so life-like. As usual, Alex Krycek had dominated his sleeping mind. This one was...different somehow. All the others were pretty much the same. He'd be fighting with Krycek, having thrown him up against a wall and giving in to his urge to kiss him. Then... 

Mulder broke his train of thought off abruptly. It hurt too much to review the thoughts over and over. He sat up, looking around. He could feel something on his arm. Mulder looked down and was surprised to see several teardrops on his arm. He swiped his hand across each eye, found them dry and was even more puzzled. 'Why are there tears on me?' 

The lingering details of his dream were still plaguing him. Mulder pushed himself up from the couch and groaned like an old man as his joints popped. He stretched quickly and reached for his keys. 'Maybe a jog will clear my mind', he thought to himself. He set out hoping the jog would help to jar the missing pieces of his dreams into place. 

As Mulder made his way downstairs he thought he caught a glimpse of a dark shadow in a car near the front entrance of his building. He watched from the corner of his eye as the shadow seemed to be moving then, as if it knew it was being watched, held perfectly still. Mulder frowned, wondering if yet another tail ha d been placed on him. At 3 in the morning, there usually aren't very many people out and about. He moved a few steps closer and watched the parked car. The shadow remained motionless. Mulder shook his head and decided that if someone was tailing him, then they had best put on their running shoes. He started to jog lightly, falling into his rhythm after a few minutes. Once Mulder had settled into a steady pace, he let his mind wander. As hard as he tried to not think about Krycek, he still found his thoughts turning to him. He knew that there were dozens of automatic reasons why he should hate Krycek. The same ones that flew through his mind every time they met. Hell wasn't that why he took his fists to Alex at every turn? Mulder's breathing deepened as he left the cool air flow around his body. He could see the reasons floating in front of him. They whirled about, almost chanting to him as he picked up his pace. The ultimate betrayal, his father's crumpled body, Scully's sister in a case of mistaken identity, Skinner's attacker. The lies that overlapped all other the other lies. Mulder's face tightened with concentration. He ran faster and faster, trying to outrun the words and lies that were growing behind him. God help him, despite his objections he knew that deep down, he just wanted one moment where everything else didn't matter. Just one moment where it could be Fox and Alex and leave all the other problems behind. He didn't want to think about all of Krycek's misdeeds. He wanted to see the man behind the assassin. He wanted to...talk to him. No harsh words, no fists. Just talk. 

As Mulder tried to outrun the demons on his trail, Alex watched from a safe distance. He had been slowly tailing him for sometime now. Mulder looked like he was running for his life. He frowned, the little crease above his nose deepening. What was Mulder thinking? He pulled off to the side and let the car idle. Mulder was running faster. He worried that at any second, he might collapse. Then his fear came true. Mulder dropped like he'd been shot. 

"Fox!" Alex cried. 

Alex ran through the park, dodging the tree branches that slapped him in the chest. He rushed up to Mulder in a blind panic. He looked about wildly, searching for any retreating figures. It dawned on him that Mulder had actually dropped of exhaustion. Alex heaved a sigh of relief. He ran a hand through Mulder's hair tenderly and gathered him into his arms. 

"Thank you...thank god..." he murmured as he heard Mulder breathing shallowly. Alex knew that it was extremely risky for him to be here right now. Perhaps, even more dangerous than only a half an hour ago. That half an hour seemed like ages ago as he cradled Mulder's head against his chest. Mulder's breathing began to even out. He blinked drowsily and looked up. 

"Damn. I must be dreaming again" he thought to himself. 

He knew it had to be a dream because there was no other explanation as to why Krycek would be holding him tenderly, comforting him. He closed his eyes. If this was indeed a dream, then he intended to hold onto this moment as long as he could. Alex watched Mulder open and close his eyes silently. He didn't seem to be overly aware of who was holding him. He wondered if Mulder was fully awake. Alex sighed and hugged Mulder tightly, humming his prayer again. 

Mulder relaxed against the arms of his dream Alex. He felt so safe and protected despite being out in the open running paths of the park. It had been such a long time since anyone had touched him this gently, he wanted to wrap his arms around his dream Alex and never let go. He reluctantly opened his eyes again when he felt rumbling vibrations through the chest of Alex. He listened intently, trying to place the familiar rhythm. In a rush, his most recent dream came back to him. He saw the fight happen again, him bellowing at Alex and shoving him up against the wall, then leaning forward and brutally kissing him, grinding their groins together. He saw Alex pulling away from him again, his desperate pleading for him to stay so he could explain. The crushing disappointment and the frustration in his dreams always brought rounds of crying that left him drained. Mulder opened his eyes again staring up at Alex. He blinked and started to realize that maybe this wasn't a dream. Everything felt so real. He could feel the damp grass under him and could see the stars in the sky. 'So many stars tonight' he thought. 

Alex watched the conflicting emotions run across Mulder's face. He tensed his body ready to fight if necessary. His heart felt heavy. He really didn't want things to come to that. Mulder would throw him around, yell at him, hurt him but Alex never fought back. He could never forgive himself if he actually physically hurt Mulder. He shuddered at the thought of losing this moment of peace. Mulder looked up at him again, blinking slowly. He breathed out slowly and smiled a little uncertainly at Fox. He ran his hand through his own hair and shrugged lopsidedly. 

"So, are you okay...?" Alex asked nervously. 

Mulder stared at Krycek with a look of confusion mixed with a frown. The fear that this wasn't a dream was starting to unnerve him. Then he spoke quietly. 

"Are you really here?" 

Alex felt his heart drop for the second time tonight. So he did think he was dreaming. Alex had never wanted to cry more before. Then Mulder spoke again, giving him hope. 

"Cause if I am still dreaming, then don't let me wake up" 

Looking down into Mulder's face, Alex leaned in to whisper a goodbye to him. As he leaned in, Mulder brought his head up. Alex breathed in Mulder's scent and closed his eyes. 

Mulder watched Alex's head descend. Without thinking, he leaned up and brought his lips to meet Krycek's. Alex's eyes shot open with disbelief. Mulder's lips were so soft, so open and inviting. He lost himself in that kiss. Little shivers ran up and down his arms. Mulder parted his lips and slid his tongue along Alex's lips. Electrical shocks ran through both of them. 

Alex pulled back abruptly, leaving Mulder hanging midair. He licked his lips quickly, still feeling the tingles everywhere. Mulder opened his eyes and saw Alex pulling back. 

"No, please don't leave...I'm sorry Alex...I don't want you to go." He pleaded with a panicked look to his eyes. He started to shake and Alex looked more frightened than before. 

Alex looked around and found the place was still deserted. He leaned forward and let his lips fall on Mulder's. Oh, the pleasure was more than he could bear. This kiss felt so right. He opened his eyes to watch Mulder's face. Mulder looked like he was in ecstasy, his arms wrapping around Alex's chest. The kiss continued. Alex felt his head spinning, he needed oxygen but he couldn't let go. Not yet, nothing could tear him from Fox's lips right now. Mulder gasped and pulled back enough to breathe. 

He moaned and pulled Alex under again. It was like being in the undertow in the ocean. He helplessly kissed Mulder back, clinging to him with all of his strength. They pulled apart and rested their foreheads together, panting with desire. Alex shivered as Mulder gently nuzzled his neck. Mulder kissed his way down Alex's throat finding a spot between his neck and the collarbone and lightly nibbled on it. Alex moaned and turned his head, allowing further access. Alex's mind swam deliriously on all the thoughts running through it at full speed. His whole body felt like it was on fire as they pressed their groins together. Mulder pulled Alex to the ground and lying almost on top of him began moving back and forth. He knew that he was rushing, but he couldn't help himself. He was so afraid that it was just a dream; he wanted to complete it as he never had been able to before. 

Alex lay stunned at what was happening. He tried to think clearly but all he could do was move in time to Mulder's thrusts. They writhed against each other, frantic to finish. Their breathing sped up and Alex felt his body tensing. Mulder was groaning his name over and over. Alex raised a shaky hand to Mulder's cheek and caressed it. He brought his mouth up to Mulder's ear and whispered "I love you, Fox" 

"Alex...oh god...ohhahhalex!" he breathed as his whole body convulsed. Alex felt his own orgasm approach and together they rose up and fell together, mindlessly calling each other's names. 

Slowly, Alex came back, aware that Mulder was still lying on top of him, breathing heavily. He eased Mulder to the ground. He ran his hands through his hair and rubbed his face. 

"What have I done?" he mumbled. 

Alex's mind began to function properly once more. Mulder was going to flip when he woke up. 'He thinks it's all a dream. I have to get him home.' Alex thought furiously, trying to figure out how to move Mulder without him waking up. He lifted him and spoke near his ear. 

"Mulder...Mulder! C'mon, we gotta go home. I can't carry you. Please Fox?" 

Mulder mumbled sleepily and rose up from the ground, leaning heavily on Alex's shoulder. Alex half-walked, half-carried Mulder back to his car. He slid him into the passenger seat and got in on his side. He rested his head on the steering wheel. After a few minutes of thoughtful silence, he drove back to Mulder's. He carefully helped Mulder upstairs. Mulder was practically sleep-walking by this time. Alex helped him onto the couch and laid him down, covering him with an afghan throw he had found in the unused bedroom. Alex crouched down by Mulder's ear and softly said 

"Fox, I know you think you're dreaming but just so you know, I love you. I always have. I have to go now. Sleep well, okay?" 

Mulder rolled onto his side and mumbled "I love you Alex...don't hate me, I can't help it." 

Alex sat back on his heels. He didn't know what to do now. He stood up and looked around the apartment. He found a piece of paper on the cluttered desk and scratched out a quick note. Then he left, locking the door for the second time tonight. 

Mulder awoke a few hours later. He felt stiff and sore all over. He remembered the dream in an instant. He put his head back down and dry-sobbed. He couldn't believe that it was all a dream. He wanted it to be real so badly. He covered his eyes and gave into the tears that flowed over his cheeks.   
  

If you enjoyed this story, please send feedback to SpookyStarbuck


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